Evening Hosts Lampoon Trump's Controversial 'Gold Card' Visa Program

TV's leading comedians used the evening criticizing former President Donald Trump's newly announced visa initiative, called the "Trump card," describing it as a clear cash-for-residency system for the wealthy.

The Late Show's Pointed Take

Starting his program, Stephen Colbert delivered a sardonic holiday song targeting the commander-in-chief. "He's making a list, checking it twice, then giving that list to the people at ICE," he crooned. "The President ... destroys all he comes into contact with."

The subject was the new program that permits overseas citizens to acquire U.S. residency for an investment of a million dollars, or "top-tier" option for five million. An official page promises approval "faster than ever."

"A quick note for you to affluent foreigners: before you fork over the cash, have you considered Canada?" Colbert quipped.

He pointed out that the scheme is also designed to "squeeze cash" from firms wishing to hire skilled workers, requiring hefty fees. "That is a lot of fees, however if you sign up, you additionally get free accommodation at a hotel of your selection – if it's the Tampa Marriott Bonvoy," he added.

"The best screening the U.S. government has ever done," stated Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick, "a $15,000 vetting to ensure these applicants absolutely are eligible to be in America."

"That is important, you gotta prove you're suitable to be an American," Colbert deadpanned. "Question one: how many burgers would you eat for a free T-shirt?"

Jimmy Kimmel's Blistering Critique

On his late-night show, Jimmy Kimmel referred to the initiative the "Get Into America Express Card."

"Here's a card that will let rich overseas citizens to live here," he said. "For a million dollars, you get legal visitor status, you get a route to citizenship, and a president's pardon for one significant crime of your choosing."

"Maybe it's time to update that inscription on the Statue of Liberty – to hell with your huddled masses. Pay a million bucks, you're in!" he joked.

Kimmel lampooned the brevity of the application, observing it is "tougher to start a Wordle account." He lamented that Trump "believes citizenship is something you can sell, like a condo."

"Indeed, the best people are the rich people," Kimmel quipped. "That's what Jesus always said! Read it in the Bible. He says it's simpler for a camel to go through the eye of a needle if you give the needle a million dollars."

Seth Meyers covering Affordability Concerns

Elsewhere, Seth Meyers addressed Trump's slipping approval numbers amid financial concerns. "People gave Donald Trump a another term because they were mad about the economy," he noted.

Recently, in a attempt to tackle affordability, Trump held a briefing in front of a selection of grocery items, and behaved peculiarly to some cereal.

"What a nice job, I think I'm going to take a few of them back to my place and have a lot of fun," Trump stated. "Such as the Cheerios, I haven't seen Cheerios in a long time."

"He is so incredibly weird," Meyers reacted. "Like, you're going to take them home to your cottage to have a lot of fun with them? What exactly happens with those Cheerios?"

Meyers wrapped up by targeting conservative news coverage of Trump's financial performance. "Perhaps instead of voicing concerns, you should give him a sparkling trophy similar to what FIFA did," he joked.