My Single Adjustment That Worked: How I Conquered After-Work Stress Through an Unexpected Discovery in the Loft

I frequently become as tense as a wound-up clock after work. My shoulders grow tense, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Usually, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Later, several months back, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. As a child, I had no musical talent whatsoever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I watched dozens of YouTube videos aimed at children, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, yet for a stressed, impatient, musically-challenged adult, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son questioned my actions (and begged me to quit), but I persevered – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and painstakingly copy the finger positions. My breath calmed, my attention sharpened, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Now, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a decent Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but for me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and how it clears my mind while playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, and my son’s childhood.

I make it a habit to play each night after work before I do anything else, and during those 20 minutes, I am in my own little world. And afterwards, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends find it amusing, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.